🤜🤛 @Jynx 

sorry I fell asleep! 

Hope you got some sunshine today and was able to do some adventuring before jumping on here. 

Yeah I feel like this is much worse this year.  And certainly no tapering off. Waiting… hoping for it to happen but it just doesn’t seem to be. Life is usually back to some kind of normalcy by now. 

it feels scary to talk about cause it feels so out of control. Feels so in the unknown. Will the people I talk about it to understand? Will they get it? Or will I be put in the freaks too hard basket? 
Nah not my gp. I think if anyone it would be my support worker.  I’ve mentioned it briefly to her and she has commented that her daughter has struggled with that a bit. (All 4 of her daughters have mental health issues). So I guess that is reassuring. But it still feels really hard to talk about. I don’t understand it. I don’t know what is going on half the time. Like today. I go to community mh for my psych appointment, I’m sitting there super anxious. I start getting heaps agitated and rocking back and forth and then I’m gone. No freaking idea what happened and how I got back out to the car. But approx 90mins went by and I was not at my appointment. Like what the heck??? What? Why? How? I sat in the car crying freaked out. I don’t know what is going on. some how managed to get myself home feeling so sick. 

I could notify her… I’d have to call her cause they don’t blinking allow any other form of communication. It makes me angry. Maybe I could get my SW to email her. I’m sure that’s allowed. Yeah I think this psych has supported me through dissociation in session… or at least the start of it and she caught it before it progresses too far. My old psych did heaps and she was good at supporting me. 

I been heaps emotional this afternoon. It’s exhausting though