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Thanks @Maggie
i ended up going out. Not where I was suppose to be. I just drove. Ended up in our botanical gardens where I sat for 5 hrs. I just sat. I cried. I walked. Contemplated a lot. Called lifeline. It’s been a difficult day, i can’t even find words.
I did not want to come home. I hate being at home. I feel such a heaviness being here. I nearly did not make it back. I had to stop and pull over so many times. Dam it I feel so stupid and useless.
I’m sorry I’m such a downer here. I should stay away.
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