Funnily enough @WIP my dog (and cat) also kept me going. I also thought they would be better off without me  But that just is not true - our fur babies become so close to us - they feed of our emotions, know when we are not right and give us unconditional love and if that is the only thing for us to hold onto to keep going then that is important. I love that you try to find the small ithings in each day to feel some positivity about. It is very true that the negative things tend to overtake our thinging and it takes a lot of practice (and will) to let the positives occupy most of our thoughts. I think it is human nature to let the neagtives affect us the most. Having small goals each day can make a massive difference. I like to make lists - and then cross things off as I do them. It enables me to actually see what I have done and take some comfort from achieving things. They do not have to be big things, in-fact the smaller things all combined often mean more - having a shower, preparing a meal, walking your dog, etc, Routines are also good - do these same small things each day.Routines help us to focus and actually move and achieve things each day ...then you can tick them off your list until they become second nature. As for hope - that is the hardest one - especially when you are in that dark place. But many here held out that hope for me when I could not see it for myself so now I will also hold out that hope for you. There is a way forward @WIP but I am not going to say it is easy - in saying that though if/when you get through this you will find you have had more strength and more courage than you ever imagined you could have - and a life that holds more for you than mere existing. There is being alone as well as loneliness - you have now joined us here on the forum so you will not be alone - the community is here for you.