Is meaningful change possible

[Former-Member]

I have been treading water too long, that's the problem Faith and Hope,the "change"was my chance to swim to shore,it only took me out further,took what I did have,left me empty.I know your family are challenging,besides my mother I am estranged from mine.

I finished a year long medical exemption from Centrelink but think I will have to go and get another one,no jobs around here for me,applied for 1 , in a rural area realise I will never get my life back.I am distressed while typing this.Didn't walk tonight,bit tired but I have had a reasonable busy day.But have done 47 KMS since Saturday,lately total week has been under 30.I used to walk 100 KMS a week.Not a good change.Saw your pics.

[Faith-and-Hope]

Easy does it @Former-Member .... whatever you can manage walking-wise is good enough for now. You can build back up .....

My walking is usually somewhere between half a km and about 10km, but I don't log it .... I just walk when I can for as much time or energy I have for the day.

This flu has stopped me now for the last week, but I know I'm not well yet and it wouldn't be wise to try.

There are others on the forum who have been where you are, and understand exactly how you're feeling .... keep swimming .... life can take surprising positive turns as well. There are also a lot of people here who have broken away from family, recognising that the relationships are not good for them, and the issues too big to surmount ....

Are there any interest groups in your community ?

[Former-Member]

Thanks Faith and Hope,yes I realised there was a lack of respect for me from family,it makes life stressful eg:had to make myself scarce last week to avoid visiting family member in town.I am not o e who can forgive and forget,wish I could because it does destroy you,but I can't go back for second's because I keep myself safe as much as possible from myself.

I'm not interested in interest groups,can't handle anyone putting me in the position to explain myself.Keep to myself as much as possible.I did watch 50 shades of grey the movie on TV last night,to my shock I liked it and think I will have to go to the cinema next week when the sequel is released.!Might be good for the mental health the shock factor!Lol.

I haven't had anything positive for 4-5 years,when you continually are negatively reinforced by your actions or in your life,you can see how people are suppressed.Takes a while to recover from the flu Faith and Hope.

[Faith-and-Hope]

Glad you do take yourself out to the movies @Former-Member .... 

This is the worst flu any of us have ever encountered .... I am treating it with great respect.

Free online crosswords and jigsaw puzzles are available, if it's your interest .... I find them to be a great circuit breaker when I am feeling anxious, like I am at the moment.   WH and MIL are not treating this flu with respect.  Maybe they will get away with it, maybe they won't .... it's hard to be witness to it so I have to find ways to switch off.

[Former-Member]

Understand,switching off is hard with anxiety,I have read the library the past year to switch off the thoughts.If there is one lesson I have learnt in this it's to look after yourself..Sounds selfish but you are no good too anyone if you don't.As I have found on this website,we all have the common attributes of pleasing others,, sensitive,letting others putting us down etc,with the right or wrong environment conditions it can change our life and not for the better.In your case sounds like you  need to switch off more than saying to yourself "I love my mother in-law!"like Fred Flintstone said repetitively to overcome anger.That didn't work anyway.

[Faith-and-Hope]

Oh yes, @Former-Member .... I think that is lesson no. 1 .....

[Former-Member]

Hard lesson to learn

[Faith-and-Hope]

Yes .... It is ....

@Former-Member

[Faith-and-Hope]

@Dothemo .... I have a question about ADD and how it affects you, if that's okay ?

My hubby is exhibiting such a confusion of different things along with his e.d., and OCD is quite clearly one of them .....

I had been under the impression that ADD meant difficulty concentrating and staying on-task .... and yet you are studying successfully ...... it has dawned on me that although my hubby has been a workaholic almost all odour married life (OCD) .... he has also always had background distraction happening while he is working .... the TV playing endlessly for instance .... and has set up several computer screens, with multiple things open at once .....

I multi-task relatively well. I presumed the multiple screens was this for him. He always said he needed the background TV on while he was working to keep him awake cos he would work all night sometimes, but it has just dawned on me that this is possibly a difficulty in maintaining attention on one thing and needing to keep several balls in the air all the time .....

What do you think ?

[Dothemo]

Hi @Appleblossom

In response to your question I don't mind at all! I think it's excellent, I've had a few things on my plate so I haven't had time to keep up with the thread and respond, I'll have time soon.

If others read this, apologies if I have missed anything addressed to me, I've been a bit busy but luckily it won't last for that long.

Hi @Lisbeth

Thankyou, you didn't make any mistakes. I agree with your views completely and yes I prefer the company of others like us as well 🙂