Is meaningful change possible

[Former-Member]

Cute,they looked fed.One of my deep regrets in my change was a cat I rescued and loved,gave her to someone when I moved and she went missing.I am haunted by her,I loved her.She is microchipped but she was wild ,only to me who knew her.I would love to think she's alive but fear she isn't.

[Faith-and-Hope]

I love cats @Former-Member .... I feel a special bond with them.  

Would you get another one ?

[Former-Member]

I have two faith and Hope.They didn't get along with her.Had my time over would had done it different,not made the change at all as it as I said was for nothing and I lost what I realised I had.She had a smoky blue coat and she used to live in the paddock and I would call her morning and night for feed when the other two were locked up.They are all dumped cats.I have a soft spot too,do get very p***** off when people don't desex or cruel to animals.

[Faith-and-Hope]

The vets here voluntarily collect street cats, des ex them, given them immunisations, and return them to the city parks ..... I love it ❣. You see people leaving cat beds for them, or coming to feed them, leaving water dishes etc .... 

I'll try to take some photos for you when I'm over this flu and walking through a "cat park" again.

@Former-Member

[PeppiPatty]

Dear @Dothemo @pip ( hi @pip ! ) @Faith-and-Hope @Sahara @Former-Member

I've written about this before......but does it feel like WE are on a different journey than our "normal," friends ? 

A Psychotherapist called Laing, a Psychotherapist who specialized in people suffering times of mental ill health and other unmet needs........ used to write...."normal,' people's lives are like a line that goes up and down ....but people who suffer mental ill health have far far more interesting lives because their lives go up on an angle......The Author Anne Devenson met Laing in England and she writes of their interview on the wonderful book, "Wish I was..."

I wonder if we can do change only what we want......maybe not what others would think ? 

For instance I am trying to bring in change by writing a novel.......

[Dothemo]

Hi @PeppiPatty
I'm good today thanks, I hope you are well. Thank you for the kind reply. I really like that, "turn monologues into dialogues" - so from your post I figure you mean that it is best to change in little ways and take things one step at a time? I think I can do that, I find too much change all at once quite overwhelming.

Oh, and I think we are on a different journal to others no doubt. I think we are aware of things that others would never conceive of and take for granted. I must see if "wish I had" is on Kindle, it sounds like a very interesting book. Regarding only changing what we want, perhaps we can - I'd like to think that I have that kind of control but I'm not so sure.

So, you are writing a novel? That is awesome!

Hi @Faith-and-Hope
Thank you, it does help very much. When I have tried to change all at once, it hasn't succeeded so far, baby steps it will be. One day at a time 🙂

Hi @pip
I'm very glad to hear that your new job has worked out excellently. Yes, at times I find change very scary, especially moving house! But now I think the consequence for not changing are a whole lot more frightening, this is providing me with needed self-motivation!

Hi @Former-Member
Thank you for your advice. Yes, this change is something I really need more than want. I feel that I must adapt to survive if that makes sense. I'm sorry you experienced all those things, I've experienced workplace bullying and it is horrible and hard to deal with. Because in my experience anyway, there has been a power imbalance (i.e. I've been bullied by a supervisor or someone with the bosses favor). I hope you feel better soon.

I'm also sorry that you lost your cat. I myself am mad about cats so I can understand how you feel. I think there is a good chance your lost cat is alive and thriving. Cats are very strong and independent creatures. Sometimes I wish I could summon the mental strength of the feline spirit! I would feel almost invincible 🙂

Hi @Sahara
Thank you for sharing that, I am glad you are better for what you experienced now. It is interesting how people change, I think I've changed several times and I expect to change again. It is a weird feeling thinking back to when was different isn't it?! Hmm that is excellent news regarding your friend who changed like for the positive, I love hearing positive stories like that! They are exciting and give hope. 🙂

[Former-Member]

Hi all thanks Faith and Hope
I lost over 55 kgs in my early thirties PeppiPatty but inside I was still that fat person,so yes I changed but you need to change and see it the way you look at everything in life,in a holistic way,physical,social, emotional, psychological.The weight loss can be controlling through the obsessive compulsive behaviour you need to exercise and emotional eating  problems etc.It contributed to my breakdown as I used to get up at 4am in the morning to 8km walk before work.Change is like writing a novel,you have to edit it and refine it for the final result.Look forward to your photos Faith and Hope.

[Former-Member]

Good luck Dothemo!Sorry I am Miss Negative!Laugh or cry

[Faith-and-Hope]

Hi @Former-Member ..... wow .... connect .... my hubby has a hidden eating disorder after having lost 76kg ..... had BED previously and now it has morphed to something atypical that encompasses several forms .... 😔

You don't know how much it means to find someone who has made their way thru this mire .....

[Former-Member]

I eat for stress,the change exacerbated mental illness,lost my walking track because I moved to town have put weight on and now worry because I have given up on myself Faith and Hope .I don't believe I have made it through and to tell the truth most times I regret I am still here.As I said my change was detrimental.I am unemployed,been on exemption from looking for work for over a year and worried how I am going to go with the pressure of job seeking next week when it ends,now on a type of disability classification from Centrelink  due to depression.Not how I wanted to end up after changing my life to gain employment and  it didn't happen.

I was an obese child lost around 50 kg when I was 13.Put it back on.I can see the impact of obesity on my life,can believe the media on the cost of people like me because it contributed greatly to my  negative social,emotional, psychological and physical experiences.I have lost over 100 kg in my lifetime,got the batwings,excess skin to go with it.You can change but you have to deal with the impact.That can be hard because of the sacrifices that are made.