Check it

[Christheart]

I'm making a check in as apart of my morning routine. Apart of my illness is debilitating brain fog, and I'm finding that I'm forgetting things in the morning, getting lost in anxiety, and struggling to get out of bed. So I've made a check list of my morning routine to hopefully help me stay on track and get ready for the day. And remember to take my medication. 

Apart of my check list is to check in on SANE on this forum. Coming on SANE is so helpful because it reminds me I'm not alone and I'm not a loser, there are lots of people struggling. Feeling like a loser makes me feel incredibly depressed and hopeless in the morning, today I woke up thinking 'why can't I just be normal and happy like everyone else' but the truth is 'everyone else' is not normal and happy. They may look it on the street, but there are people in their houses struggling too, that you dont see. The world outside offers a false idea of what most people are like. Coming on the forums reminds me there are many of us suffering. I'm not alone and I'm not a loser. 

So I'll check in here every morning hopefully, to avoid crisis one day at a time and to get a dose of the 'real world'. Mornings happen to be the hardest time for me, usually the anxiety lessens in the evening to a somewhat bareable level.  

🙂 that's my attempt at an intervention. 

[Captain24]

I love your checklist @Christheart.

You are not alone and you are not a loser. 

Good on you for trying to maintain a routine to help you start the day. 

Im sorry that mornings are the hardest for you and your anxiety is worse. I love that you remind yourself that it will get easier as the day goes on. 

[Christheart]

Thank you @Captain24 

It's really hard right now, I've been at a loss of how to cope for the last hour, about to go to work for a few hours now.

[Captain24]

I hope work is going well for you and that it’s a good distraction @Christheart 

Are you still working in the disability sector? 

[Christheart]

@Captain24 Thankfully, yes work if going OK. We're just doing some arts and crafts, I've been able to do some drawing and it's nice and quiet. Yes working in disability. I don't think I'd be able to work anywhere else. I'm blessed to have a job where I can be ill and the clients still value my company. They don't care if I seem a little off or depressed. 

[Captain24]

I’m glad it was ok @Christheart. I’m sure they bring a smile to your face as much as you do for them! 

[Christheart]

@Captain24 @tyme checking in... I hardly slept last night... it's was really horrible... I feel at my wits end... I've come to the gp this morning for an emergency appointment, I won't make it through this if I can't atleast have the relief of sleep 😞

[Captain24]

I’m sorry you didn’t sleep. @Christheart. It makes things so much worse for us. I hope you get an emergency appt and the GP can help you. I think I need to make one too but I have a psych appt today so I’m hoping she can help me. If I go. 

You can do this and you will make it through! I have my faith in you. 

[Christheart]

@Captain24 

It does. Sleeping is the only break I get from my mind 😔

I got the appointment. Now I just need to make sure I get there. Really struggling today. 

[fluffylight]

Hi @Christheart 🙂 

fluffylight here 

Struggle street can be hard, hoping you can take a right turn to get to to your GP today.

You deserve it 💛

fluffylight x