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10 Oct 2023 10:36 AM
10 Oct 2023 10:36 AM
10 Oct 2023 10:58 AM
10 Oct 2023 10:58 AM
@down_not_out I am not too bad. Aches and pains means I have to get off the couch and computer in a minute, but have developed a lifestyle of garden and music, which is pretty lovely.
How are you?
10 Oct 2023 10:59 AM
10 Oct 2023 10:59 AM
10 Oct 2023 11:16 AM
10 Oct 2023 11:16 AM
I'm doing okay thanks. It is the one-year anniversary of ceasing all of the nasty meds that I have been taking for around 25 years.
In the last few weeks, I have been walking at night around the neighborhood and even went inside the local supermarket last night when it was quiet. I'm still extremely uncomfortable around strangers though. My wife has been with me each time and is a great support.
I've got to talk to someone about my past trauma though but do not feel at all comfortable doing so.
10 Oct 2023 11:25 AM
10 Oct 2023 11:25 AM
10 Oct 2023 11:28 AM
10 Oct 2023 11:28 AM
@down_not_out it's good to hear that things are progressing for you. I'm so glad you have the wonderful support of your wife.
Yep it's hard to talk about past trauma. And of course there is the need to find someone who you completely trust whom you can confide in. It's tough.
Hanami 🙂
10 Oct 2023 11:32 AM - edited 10 Oct 2023 11:33 AM
10 Oct 2023 11:32 AM - edited 10 Oct 2023 11:33 AM
Yeah, I have to do this in order to progress further. I'm quite jaded and cynical about the industry after being treated badly by some bad people. This line of thinking is not doing me any favours though.
10 Oct 2023 11:55 AM
10 Oct 2023 11:55 AM
It seems like the biggest thing I am suffering from atm is the feeling of guilt and shame that comes from being abused and not speaking up about it.
There is also an intense fear of being judged.
10 Oct 2023 12:08 PM
10 Oct 2023 12:08 PM
Gosh @down_not_out that's awful. Those feelings must be really hard for you to hold 😪
10 Oct 2023 12:37 PM - edited 10 Oct 2023 12:42 PM
10 Oct 2023 12:37 PM - edited 10 Oct 2023 12:42 PM
It is eating away at me.
As an older male, I feel invisible when it comes to being able to discuss having been SA -d in a hospital. But I cannot keep it in or forget about it. Goodness knows I have tried.
I did tell my treating psychiatrist about it in the clinic last year, and she suggested that I join a men's shed. This is fine if you need some interaction and socialisation but not where I'm at at the moment.
And I am damn sure that the people who committed these acts are well aware of how much they can get away with. Institutional abuse is way too common - sadly
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