Lived Experience Forum

[Janee]

2 years ago, I moved to the country so I could afford to pay the rent. While there are a lot of things I like about the country, the worst thing about it is there are no services for people with mental health problems. The doctors here are all from other countries, and so far, not one of them is at all interested in listening to me about the depression and anxiety I have lived with my whole life. When I lived in the city, most GPs had a good understanding of what works, and what didn't work. Here, all they want to do is test your thyroid, and put you on medication for it. Yes, I know the thyroid can play a huge part in depression, but every time they test it, the result is the same, it hasn't changed for 30years! I am a mess, I live alone, with just my dog for company, I struggle to leave the house for any reason, I feel alone, lonely and isolated. I have been to 6 different doctors in my town, and surrounding towns, and they all tell the same story, we'll test you for this and that, but we won't talk about depression, or a mental health plan, or anything to do with mental health. I am screaming for help, and I'm not getting any. It get's harder every day, the few friendships I have have disappeared, and I just cry and sleep all the time. I'm always on edge, and feel like I may as well end it. The only thing that keeps me going is my dog. She is the only reason I don't find a way to end it. I just can't live like this, it's too hard.

[Fancy_Pants]

Hi @Janee

Welcome and thank you for taking the time to write about your experiences on here.It sounds like you are hitting a lot of brick walls and feeling very frustrated, what options are you considering at the moment? I might be reading too much but your statement "i cant live like this" worries me, unfortunately we are not a crisis service but if you are thinking about harming yourself please call one of these numbers

Lifeline: 13 11 14 or Crisis Chat

Suicide call back service: 1300 659 467 or online counselling

If in immediate danger: 000

If I am wrong though I was thinking about the organisation MIND here who have peer support and outreach support services, I wonder if they could provide any guidance? I was also thinking about what you said about the importance of your dogs in your life I completely understand, they are family 🙂 and it made me think of something @Former-Member posted earlier today and article called Dogs for Therapy which is a lovely article 

there are also a number of other people on here who have described experiencing depression like @dr-ev-md @Kurra @ThirtyOne I wonder if anyone has any ideas about how you can access support in the country?

[Janee]

don't be worried, I have no intention of leaving my dog. The "I can't live like this" simply means I am completely frustrated by the lack of support. It's not living at the moment, it's just existing. 

[Fancy_Pants]

Hi @Janee

thats good to hear. Had you thought about alternative supports? like the outreach or peer networks i was suggesting?

is there any way we as a forum can support you? besides obviously listening and empathising?

[Kurra]

At various times of my life I have spent considerable periods of time livivg in an isolated rural area. When mental health plans became available I was able to see a GP just to get the plan. I had to do a face to face appointment with the psychiatrist and the psychologist in the nearest capital city but afyer that most in fact nearly all appointments were by phone with support from the nearest regional centre Community Mental Health team.

This system works extremely well. Prescriptions when required were posted to me. You will find thst many city psychiatrists and now offer this service in conjunction with Skype or similar apps. Ask around in your nearest regional centre and find out what services of tjis type are available.

Take care and keep posting. You are important to us. 💕🎶

[Former-Member]

I'm thinking and may be wrong @utopia has experience with this 💜😊

[utopia]

Hi @Janee. Yes I live in a small rural Victorian town - having moved from Melbourne. I always wanted to live in the country, & although I could not afford a farm, I could buy a house in town.
I had a great job I enjoyed in a local town & then work changed and I was getting stressed and sick. Then I had an incident with a very sick client and management would not help me. I ended up on Workcover. That's been 2 years now.
Like you our local doctors has a number of foreign trained doctors. I kept going to the same gp explaining I wasn't coping. She didn't listen. In the end my mum came to an appointment with me and told the doctor this is not my normal stress or depression - this is far worse. She demanded the gp help get me a psychologist appointment (I'd been on a wait list for months). So the gp phoned the counseling service and I got an appointment within the week. This gp has now become my biggest health advocate. No. She had no experience with MI. She has been on a huge learning curve.
So firstly I'd recommend going to a gp with an advocate - a friend. If this is not possible - as it sounds like you are pretty isolated - then when you phone the doctors to make an appointment - tell the receptionist tgat you will need a longer than usual appointment as you need a Mental Health Plan drawn up and a referral to a psychologist. You can also explain to the receptionist that you are really struggling and how so far no doctor has helped. Can she put you in with someone who understands. Chances are - the receptionist will help.
Another option is to contact the nearest hospital and ask to speak to the CAT (crisis assessment team) who can support you until a psychologist appointment is found. They may also be able to suggest some further options that may help.
As hard as it is - YOU need to demand the help you need. Stupid I know - when we are at our weekest and most vulnerable - that WE have to be our own advocates.
Earlier this year I went to a private hospital in Melbourne because I was having SI. There I was allocated a psychiatrist - the first I've ever had. He's based in Melbourne - so our sessions are via SKYPE. He uses Medicare for most of his clients - although mine is through WorkCover. So there are options available out there.
@Fancy_Pants offered some good links that will be worth looking into.
I wish you all the best. Don't give up. Keep trying to get the help you deserve and need

[Janee]

I have emailed Mind Victoria, and am awaiting a response. I'll look into the others in the next day or two. The fatigue is making it hard for me to comprehend what I am reading and/or writing at the moment. Thank you for the links.

[Former-Member]

Hi @Janee, thought long and hard what to say yo you that could help. I live in a small town with no family or close friends and a depression anxiety... is a full time job staying on top of. Its good that you're here, most of us understand and havevuseful tips. But first I want you yo feel heard so it might seem a bit dorky but sometimes it helps when people reflect back at you what they think you're saying (correct me if I got any of it wrong):

YOUR CIRCUMSTANCES: 
- financial difficulties
- moved to country town 2yrs years ago
- no family/close friends near
- limited small town resources,
- unhelpful local doctors
- living alone (with a great dog)
- friendships are fading

YOUR BEHAVIOUR: crying a lot, sleep too much, agitated & on edge all the time, get stuck inside the house too much.

YOU FEEL: lonely, alone, isolated, connected only to your dog, tired and that life gets harder every day, trapped, fear that you might not have the strength to go on like this anymore

YOU THINK: 
- you're "in a mess" (a bad way), 
- you can't figure out what to do
- the future looks bleak
- nobody hears your subtle cries for help, or seem to care
- suicidal thoughts ("may as well end it")
- your dog is the ONLY reason you don't find a way to act on bad thoughts, or leave.
- you want things to change but don't know what to do

Was that about right? I hear you!!! You're not alone.

A couple of practical things I thought of you might like to try are:
1. Can you have your history or a letter from previous medical center forwarded to new Dr?
2. Go check out the local hospital and casually approach a couple, different nurses (RN or Enrolled Nurses, not AINs) telling them your fairly new to town & wondered if they knew any of the doctors good with Mental Health Issues. If there is a Social Worker there - they usually know who's good.
3. Where's your nearest Psychologist or Medicare rebate funded counsellor? You could ring them and ask them what Dr in town is most likely to write a Mental Health Care Plan Referral for you. They know who sends the most clients their way.
4. Maximize Online Services & Phone calls. Ring Lifeline once a week or as needed. Join chat sites like this (really cool that you're here by the way), Google things. Hire comedy movies and laugh the pain out. Go walk the dog, sit in the park with a coffee and analyse the body language of passerby's. Pinch a piece of lavender or scented geranium hanging onto the footpath on the way home, smell them, and any roses. Thank the universe for every shade of green you see, and birds etc. Breathe it in and feel loved. Check out any interest groups on town & join just one to start with. Eat vegies +++ Google 'self care' and self compassion, read Russ Harris Books, visit the library every week..

There's a thread here somewhere called "the coping box" which others have listed what they do to cope when down. You need to replenish your inner resources. This is the best time of year to kick start a new life plan. Your higher self knows what's best. Press on, take back lost ground, a little piece at a time, for the good days. And they will come. Keep posting. Hugzz!
😊. 💜 🌷. 🌸. 🌹. 🌻. 🌼🐇

[utopia]

Beautifully written @Former-Member. @Janee I hope you can follow up on some of @yawney suggestions.