Lived Experience Forum

[Lochlyn]

Hi all, I'm new to this and only about 5 months ago accepted and opened up about my problems with anxiety and depression issues. I've had been off work for nearly a year after a mental break down which had blown my anxiety and depression out of control. After traveling and spending most days and nights sleeping, I believe it is time to get back to work. Im curious as to how some of you approach this? And did it help with your MI? Your input would be greatly appreciated. Thank you

[Former-Member]

Take it slow @Lochlyn, maybe part time but definitely a not too stressful role. Manage your stress levels - this is most important because us who suffer anxiety are often disconnected from it in our body, the awareness, gotta be proactive (walking, antidrprrssants, relaxation exercises, nutritious diet.//).
I found going to TAFE or some other study course that required my physical presence, this was a good way to ease back into society. All the best. xox

[Lochlyn]

Thanks @Former-Member. Unfortunately my role for work involves problem solving technical issues and is usually set at high risk environments. I've tried everything that you suggested that doesn't required for me to leave the house. Ok,.. walking it is lol thanks again

[Change123]

Hi @Lochlyn

I'm actually a HR Manager who has BPD.

First bit of advice unless you really feel you can trust them dont tell them your mental health issues.  I have seen this work against so many employees.  Yes they are not allowed to discriminate but I think we all know they just move around that and find another reason.

Like @Former-Member said parttime would probably be preferable since you have worked in alittle while but sometimes jumping straight in can be ok dependent on you.  I had 12 months off work and after being for the first time in Centrelink I needed to get out and back into working before I really lost my mind (thanks Centrelink!). For me I find working helpful, it gives me a distraction from myself, it gives me routine which for me is important and a sense of self worth for being able to work.  How do I deal with triggers, which I have had quite a few lately:

1. Go for a walk to calm down or even to the loo for some quiet and do breathing excercises
2. As I love music I play something relaxing like Pink Floyd when I'm stressing out and it usually calms me down
3. Try not to get involved in the politics around the place
4. If I need to I can close my office door and just keep to myself

it will depend on your environment and what the culture is at your new work place.

I wish you all the best and just dont be too hard onyourself if you find it harder than expected - remember you have been away from all this for a few years and its hard dealing with other people's crap in a professional manner.  If it doesnt work out find something part time.

[Lochlyn]

Wow you hit a few nails there! When I came out about my MI I really came out! lol I just didn't care. Fortunately not only was my work being supportive, our competitors were also letting me know they have a place for me when I'm ready. So thank god for that. What I'm worried about is, i find it extremely difficult to focus and complete a task and the fear of letting anyone down is overwhelming. Another is the anxiety, from being able to confidently debate and convince a large group of people on stage, to now barely being able to talk to one person without uncontrollably sweating and stuttering. Despite all this, seeing my family financially struggle because of me is far worst. I know I am getting better because at it's peak (mi) I didn't care nor did I see how much it effected everyone around me. I have been taking it easy, most days if I'm not too overwhelmed and in bed, Im cleaning the house, cooking and preparing school lunch for the kids for the week! While listening to jazz over the fake YouTube fireplace lol Something I didn't enjoy doing until now. Thank you for the kind words and advices. I really needed that.

[Lochlyn]

I've just re-read what I've wrote. I've contradicted myself by saying I can't focus and complete a task. With the cooking and cleaning that is. That I've always made sure it is done to perfection. Yet everything else I struggle with. 🤔

[Change123]

@Lochlyn

Looks like we have something in common, I stutter too!

Just 12 months ago and I'm 48 I went to a speech pathologist and have learnt some tricks and much better now but it still over takes me if I'm triggered.  As for public speaking, I was always a very shy person especially because of my stuttering.  Before I was even diagnosed I use to work for another insurance company where the owner was a woman and very influential and a millionaire.  She used to always put us OUT OF OUR comfort zone.  You can imagine how that effected me even though I did not know at the time what was wrong BUT in the end it worked to my advantage as it gave me confidence.  I was doing my HR certificate and part of it was doing a presentation in front of the class. OMG I was so stressed about this and the fact that I would probably stutter but I didnt and it gave me more and more confidence.  One thing I learnt during speech pathology and recording our sessions you often think you sound worse than you really do.

Below is a link to the Sydney stuttering institute, I had done the camperdown program not sure if you will find it helpful.

I think you just lack confidence from being out of the workplace for so long.

PS I like Jazz too, I have a huge range of music from some thrash to rock to pop to jazz to blues and soul.  I enjoy a little of everything but I cant get my head around classical or opera they have their place just not at my house! 

http://sydney.edu.au/health-sciences/asrc/downloads/index.shtml

[Mosaic]

Hi @Lochlyn 

Sounds like you really committed yourself to some much needed recovery time, which is good to hear. Now that you're feeling a bit more rested and restored, you're contemplating a return to work. Sounds like you are highly regarded in your field, and your colleagues have been looking out for you. Reading your posts I thought you might like to link in to some of our regular Career Chat sessions - The events are hosted by @Renstar and run every week on Fridays between 10am-4pm. Below are a few past Career Chat conversations you might find relevant to your current circumstances:

• Finding a job after a long time out of the workplace
  
• Returning to work
• Feeling overwhelmed at work
  
• Maintaining confidence and self esteem while job hunting
  

@Change123 and @Former-Member have offered some good ideas about how to make the transition back to work smoother. I wonder if fellow members @Kurra and @Former-Member might like to share some of their experiences too as I know they have been through similar circumtances and faced similar anxieties with returning to work.

In terms of difficulty completing tasks, this can sometimes happen as a result of elevated anxiety. Going blank, feeling confused, procrastinating etc - all can be quite frustrating when anxiety strikes! I wonder whether things like making the kids lunches and cleaning the house - while super important jobs! - don't induce the same sense of anxiety for you as being in a work environment and having to "perform" in a way. What do you think?

[Renstar]

Hi @Lochlyn and thanks @Mosaic, @Change123 and @Former-Member! 

I would love to hear from you all on Friday ... only 2 more CareerChats left for the year so logon this week and join in the conversation ... We're talking about what you like about work this week ... 

But seriously I'm happy to discuss any topic ... Especially important stuff like getting back to work which is my specialty 

Hope to chat soon xo

[Former-Member]

Thanks for mentioning me but I realise I won't be returning to work,cant get a job and even though I am trying,wonder if I can handle the pressure,plus my low self confidence,and my withdrawn state due to the severe depression and anxiety,I realise is a major obstacle.I have no fight response which you need in a competitive workplace,so as I said to my psychologist,I would have to find work where I could work at my own pace.Good luck with that one.For example,put in for a housekeeping job in the small town I am in,which I avoid shopping in or be seen in due to my anxiety,and the shame I feel in being unemployed,or being gossiped about with my mental illness,etc.
PS:I feel for yous that stutter,I had a reaction to antidepressants in 2013 after only three days of being on them I had facial ticks,muscle spasms,and vocalised syllables when agitated.Had it for months and had to shut myself away from the world.I had no control.