Lived Experience Forum

[NatureLover]

Hi @Bow , you're not around which means things are very bad for you 😞

I hope you're getting good care... 🤞 Sending lots of 💜

[Paperdaisy]

Hey @Bow wanted to check on you... I hope your appointment goes well today. I hope you're OK 💝

[Bow]

Really not ok @Paperdaisy @NatureLover  staying away though so I don’t upset others or get into trouble 

[Captain24]

Thinking of you @Bow. I really hope things start to settle soon. 

[NatureLover]

Am happy to see you here @Bow ❤ But very sorry to hear you're not OK 😥

You have a psych appt today...are you able to go to it and tell her how bad things are?

Sending lots of 💜 and wishes for you...

[Emelia8]

Wrapping you up in arms of comfort and safety @Bow . 

Thinking of you and trusting you are okay.  💝

[Bow]

Thank you @NatureLover @Emelia8  for your kindness, it truly is appreciated.

I attended both appointments today. Gp appointment this morning where I showed her what I’ve been doing to myself. I was already not in a good place and I just felt like she lectured me. Anyways she dressed them and I left.

seen my psychologist this afternoon. I took some drawings and journaling in to show her. I’m already not big on words at the best of times…. And really struggled today. We had put exposure therapy in a box for this week and just focused on getting through this week with the hope things would pick up, but unfortunately they aren’t. Things have been worse this past week than they have in the lead up. I’m not sleeping much, not eating much and barely getting through the days. I have asked to pick things back up on Monday with the exposure therapy. I’ve opened that box up now and I want to finish it, but my psychologist is concerned about my constant dissociation. It’s happening in sessions and happening a lot at home, I’m very much over it and tired of trying to fight it off. Promised my psychologist that I would go to the ed if I was feeling unsafe though. 

im trying my hardest to hold it all together at home. My mum was in hospital yesterday again, the third time in 2 weeks for a blood nose. I usually take her down but it was heaps worse this time, pouring out, so had to call an ambulance. Triggering for me. 

I’m feeling really flat tonight. Emotional. I see my case manager on Friday. 
that’s all. Sorry I am not around for others. I can’t be here though. I say things that upsets people and I get into too much trouble. Thinking of you all

Bow

[tyme]

Hearing you @Bow - the waves of difficulties are so high at the moment. Just cling on. We are not asking for you to swim against the tide. We just want to be able to hold on with you - because you deserve it.

You are so resilient. There have been such difficult times, yet you have fought through like a survivor - don't let anyone take that from you!

[Emelia8]

Understand all that @Bow 

And yes,  dissociation is the enemy of exposure therapy. It means your mind is resisting. Not your fault.  ♥ Your therapist will need to find a way through all that.  Be open to suggestions,  possible changes and maybe taking things slower.  Or maybe once anniversary is over,  things will settle enough and make it easier. 

I recall when I did my PE therapy,  my clinical psych waited until months after my trauma anniversary before tackling the therapy. Anniversary time is just way too traumatising.  

Anyway @Bow just be here when you feel able,  or when you need someone.  💝

Here for you.  

[NatureLover]

Well done for going to both your appts and being honest @Bow.  I'm cross at your GP who lectured you!

Does your psychologist have any strategies for your dissociation? 

Sending more hugs and wishes... 💜