Bit of background, I live with my parents and sister.
My Dad has Stage 4 Non-hodgkins Lymphoma, he doesnt understand mental illness or how to deal with it in himself or others. He does still work but will be retiring in the near future.
My Mum is in heart failure and as an aquired brain injury. Since her brain injury she has become a different person. She is incaring, abusive, manipulative and isolates herself. She rarely leaves her room and sleeps most the day. She is a horder, not stored in her room but through out the house.
My sister is chronically ill, in constant pain and suffers from mental health issues, primarily anxiety.
I have a number of major spinal issues causing chronic pain. All going well once my final test is done I will be having nerve endings burnt off where my hips meet my spine to alevitate a lot of pain. I take a few different pain medications currently including CBD/THC oil. I have a number of other medical issues including bladder cancer and essential tremors. I also suffer from a range or mental health issues; Bipolar 2 with Psychotic features, anxiety, social anxiety and depression. All up I am on around 17 different medications daily
I currently see a heap of doctors and specialist. I am seeing a new psychologist and trying to get into a new psychiatrist at the moment, wait times for psychiatrists are around 6 months so I am likely to go online for one.
Im pretty good at managing my mental health, I know my resources, I keep to a routine, Im compliant on my medication, I see my GP regularly, though I am in the process of changing GPs as mine has left the practice, which is pretty stressful.
The past 6 weeks have put my ability to manage my medical and mental health issues to the test. About 6 weeks ago my sister started to struggle intensly and about 5 weeks ago she woke up one morning unable to walk a straight line. Doctors have put it down to stress and she spent 4 weeks in a rehab facility as her tremors in her legs were so bad she was unable to walk without aid.
The rehab facility is about an hours drive away and I was doing that around 4 times a week, when I wasnt down there I was working, maintaining the house and talking to her either on the phone or txt. She spent some time with a psychologist there who ended up contacting me via phone (with my sister there) to talk to me about home life and my sister etc.
Leading up to my sister leaving the rehab place she got more and more anxious, by the time I got there on the last day she was shaking head to toe. Within a few days of being at home she had started talking about suicide a lot and wanted to selfharm. I started trying to get her help, we were knocked back from the main hospital, she ended up selfharming so I had to take her to the local hospital and get her patched up. They talked to her, gave her some meds and sent her home. Eventually things got real bad and we took her back to the local hospital where after some back and forth she was placed under an order and sent to the main hospital again, who lifted the order but are trying to get her a bed in a mental health facility for a few days. This all went on over the course of a week, I wasnt able to work as I was dealing with this pretty much on my own.
Getting towards the end of it I was running out of steam, now she is in somewhere I have fallen in a hole. Im exhusted. Im not really sleeping well at all, Im worried about my sister. I txt her throught the night, she isnt sleeping much either. First thing I do when I wake up is check on her. Im not having any serious issues from the bipolar as yet. Im not wanting to selfharm or having any suicidal thoughts.
Today Im not going to see her, I went back to my routine, so while I wanted to keep sleeping I was up at 6am and into what I do. I plan to go back to work tomorrow, thankfully I work from home which makes it easier. Im trying to go and do the things I do to maintain my mental health, walks etc. but still make time for my sister.
EveryMan
Emergency, police & ambulance (24 Hrs)
Connect with a lifeline crisis supporter (24 Hrs)
Suicide callback service (24 Hrs)
Kids helpline (24 Hrs)
13 YARN