Just checking in.

[Mazarita]

@CheerBear, these days, and at this age, and with the medications, therapy and support, as well as a lifetime of experience of having this condition, I feel that my level of instability is mostly livable and not too extreme, though never really a balanced way of life either.

I'm at a point now where I don't want to be too controlling or worried about my own experience, though I am very conscious of how I'm rolling with things day to day. I probably am fairly controlled in a way, at least when compared with how I was when I was younger and wasn't aware I had this mental illness. Then, I would feed the flames either way, diving headlong into whatever was happening and consequently experiencing things in a much more intense and unbalanced way. At the moment, I'm thinking that I mainly need to roll with the strong tides I experience as much as I can. For me this means being open to the enjoyment of times of energy and excitement like this, while staying as relaxed as I can and avoiding letting it run away like wildfire. As you say, having a bit of excitement is in a way a better option than the extreme lack of energy and motivation I experience at other times. Trying not to judge too much either way, I guess. Acceptance and moderation as much as possible, even when moderation seems more out of reach for me than for some other people.

I hope you will find your way back to the crochet soon, as it seems to be a balancing activity for you too, as well as creative and uplifting. You are also so good at it, and always getting better, it seems to me! I imagine the sense of satisfaction in achieving your craft projects is great.

Glad to hear you have a quiet day today. Seems like you could use a restful day just now. 

An indoors day here for me probably with our friend, the aircon unit. It's forecast 32 degrees today and we are in that humid time of year. That might not be so bad for most others, but I am getting so easily overheated these days (partly a side effect of one of the psych meds, I think). There's a corner of the kitchen that's slightly warmer than the rest of the flat. When I go in there, even just for a minute or two, I often start breaking into a sweat! Aside from keeping myself cool, I'll probably be doing quite a bit on the computer today relating to the video stuff. Also want to ring Mum again.

[CheerBear]

So much respect for all that you've been through and how you approach everything @Mazarita. Your wisdom and ability to be gentle with yourself, shines ❤

Even just talking about crocheting this morning has me feeling inspired. I'd like to make something little and special for a someone who's helped me a lot over recent times. I also wanted to find something to do to help me calmly and gently move through this next stage and maybe that's it. I need to pass time today too so I think I'll go on a hunt for a suitable little project. Sometimes the hunting part is just as fun as the making part 🙂

32 where you are is really yuck! The humidity is mostly what gets me in summer. Really glad you have your friend the aircon today!

[Mazarita]

Yay to crochet inspiration today, @CheerBear! 

Thanks for your lovely words. 

Earlier in my life I was mostly against aircon and other trappings of modern life. I lived in lots of really run down rickety places that I thought were 'charming'. These days the aircon, the overhead fans and the dishwasher are my very good friends. Funny how I've  come to understand how these things can feel necessary as we age. Back then I kind of just thought older people were too soft in some way. Similarly, I used to scoff at the way older people talked so much about their medical conditions, medications, doctors and the like. These days I am a queen of such things! We talk about whatever is affecting us the most, I guess. It does amuse me sometimes to see how much I've become what I didn't want to be, and yet am mostly okay with it now. 

[CheerBear]

Haha I love the way you described those places as 'charming' @Mazarita. I used to be much more OK with getting by without things like the dishwasher, aircon and heaters also, though not so much as a conscious choice against them. Now I'd do anything to have my mate the dishwasher back! I stood at the sink in the heat of the day yesterday with my hands in the very hot water washing sooo many dishes from the kid's playing adventures, and was roasting with the heat of it. I spend so much time washing up and finding space in our tiny kitchen for dishes 😏

I found a perfect pattern within only moments. Definitely have that feeling of determination and excitement that I'd imagine you might get when you're just about to begin a project 🙂

[Mazarita]

Awesome to hear about your new project, @CheerBear! 

Not so great to hear about doing dishes in the heat by hand. This place is the first I've ever lived in with a dishwasher. It has revolutionised my life, in that I actually do the dishes now! 

Better move myself off the forum now. Great to catch up again with you this morning. Hope your day goes well. 

[CheerBear]

Haha 😁!

I'm off too, to start playing with some yarn now. Hope your day goes well also @Mazarita ❤

[Faith-and-Hope]

Morning @CheerBear @Mazarita .... dropping in a fly-by hello to you and everyone else here .... 👋💕

It’s been a whirlwind few days.  I haven’t read much around the forums, and my head is still spinning.

I hope it’s a goodish day for y’all ....

[CheerBear]

Hey @Faith-and-Hope. Big hugs for your whirlwind and the spinning ❤ Hope your family time is good for you.

Morning @outlander. Sorry I dropped out last night. Almost as soon as the last kid went to sleep I melted a bit in a puddle after having kept it together while I needed to yesterday. We love twinkling lights of all kinds. You're a great granddaughter to look after pop like you do. Hoping the unsettled feelings pass for you soon ❤

[Faith-and-Hope]

Thanks @CheerBear ....💐💕

[outlander]

Thats ok @CheerBear it sounded like you needed a release and sleep. Hugs ❤
It made me smile to know you got your crochet mojo happening again too