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Looking after ourselves

JT
Senior Contributor

Self Care

Hi Everyone,  I'm really excited to see this forum getting off the ground and looking forward to "meeting" other people that are in the same zone as me.  

After my last (3rd) breakdown I finally sought help and started listening to the advice I'd always given other people.  I was working in disability and spent my days telling people to take time out for themselves but never took my own advice.  Since my breakdown and subsequent diagnosis of bipolar I actually started practising what I preach.  Ok I'm still my own worst enemy but I've learned to put my hand up and say no and back away.  I'm a single mum, have older kids with disabilities and have recently started working fulltime again.  The last 6 weeks have been shall we say interesting as my household adjusts.  

Anyway I'm curious as to how other people look after their own wellbeing.  Funnily enough one of my biggies is going to the pub.  I know people tend to shrink back and scream self medicating, bad environment but it's not about alcohol.  I started going 3 years ago after there was a call for volunteers to sell tickets fundraising for leaukemia.  SInce then we've also raised $7,000 each for Beyond Blue and Black Dog.... for me it's about being somewhere and doing something.  I've found a bunch of people who are just simply the best and when I've had a bad day they are there for me.  Other than that I stick on my headphones to chill and my treat (now resinstated now I work fulltime!!!!) if going to a hair salon to be pampered. 

Sometimes it's the tiny things.  What do other people do?

34 REPLIES 34

Re: Self Care

Welcome JT

I'm with you on the hairdressers...mmm the head rub when washing!

Music seems to be a common thread, what's your genre?

Former-Member
Not applicable

Re: Self Care

Yes I agree with JT that your social life or network is very important. I remember being taught in the psych hospital to reach out to family and friends. It's their support that makes life easier.

Re: Self Care

For me it is about getting out into the community, doing the things that are important to me and music, ok so yeah maybe music is a common theme!

Re: Self Care

hi jt...

u're undertaking one of the best strategies for mental disorders (for everyone really) in that u're involving urself in thinking of, and helping, others in need, as it sounds like u've done most of ur life...

keep giving urself the time u need for urself, plus meds & counselling, as u learn what triggers ur episodes & strategies to control them, then u can begin to live with bi-polar...

pubs r a social outlet, not everyone there's an alcoholic or self-medicating, so if u're comfortable & njoying that environment it doesn't matter what others think & ur fundraising efforts r awsum...

i love going to the salon, too, & music is very much a stabliser for me plus time with my furkids & friends, along with meds, counselling & time out to process when i need it...

i think this is going to be a really helpful outlet for me, too... Woman Wink

Re: Self Care

For me it is doing meditation every day. This keeps me balanced and true to myself. We have to love and be comfortable within ourselves, otherwise we are always looking for external approval from other people to make ourselves feel bettter and more worthy. It has to come from within our own self. Self-love. We are all doing the best we can.Heart

 

 

Re: Self Care

sazzarocks, i'm 58 & am just realising how important self-love is - thank God!...a very slow process for me, but i'm worth it, see what i did there?! ^_^

Re: Self Care

janM, Yes self-love is key to everything about how we relate to the world. You and all of us are so worth the effort!!Smiley Very Happy

kristin
Senior Contributor

Re: Self Care

Hi JT

I completely agree with you that self-care is a big one. I also have bi polar and have always struggled with this issue all my life. I now spend a lot of energy investing in/working on it - when I can't focus on this for myown sake, because I'm struggling, I do it for my kids. If I don't demonstrate self-care (just tell them about it) then they'll just do what I do, not what I say!

I find it is really importnat to find a balance for myself between getting enough quiet time (otherwise I get manic or extremely anxious) and doing things in my community to help others who are having a rougher time than me. I can't take meds because of side-effects so I have to do my own mood stabilising, lots of quiet helps (I live in the bush). I also agree that little things can make a big difference, and often it is only ourselves - over time - who can truly be sure what works for us (we are after all individuals!).

Anyway I will check out now bcause it's past my bedtime and I have an early morning. I struggle with sleep, and even going to bed at all, if I'm really stressed. If I can get myself into bed and resting/reading by 10.30 it seems to help, even if I don't sleep the whole night.

 

Cheers, Kristin

 

Re: Self Care

And sometimes if we have been living isolated lives, it can be quite hard to reunite with our family or identify any friends. In these instances, mutual self help groups in community can be a real help in practicing friendship and communication skills. My experience has been with Grow, but other places include ADAVIC, Bipolar Babes, The Compassionate Friends and Voices Groups.
There is something incredibly healing and hopeful about being with peers with lived experience. From my Grow journey, I have moved into community mental health to work. My breakdown ended up being a career breakthrough..took a few years of volunteering but definitely cemented my values of working to build better communities and reducing stigma and discrimination...
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